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There were the good days. Days when he would laugh, tease Winry, chase Den around the yard, spar on the pretense of checking Al's reflexes and strength. He would pour himself a glass of lemonade and sprawl under a tree, reading until he fell asleep with a contented smile on his face. He would stare at the back of Winry's head with a funny little smile, and Al would dare to think he was happy.
Then there were the bad days.
They always seemed to come right after the days when he seemed the happiest, like he was coming down from a sugar rush. He would be in high spirits at dinner, joking and eating with gusto, then tickle Al just to hear him laugh and rush off to bed, taking the steps two at a time and appearing to be fast asleep by the time Al entered their room. But the next morning, he wouldn't wake up for hours. He would just sleep and sleep and sleep, and sometimes Al would peek in and catch him just lying there, staring at the ceiling or the wall and not showing the slightest inclination to get up.
When he finally did get up on these days, he would pick at his food, respond to everyone with grunts or monosyllabic words, and wander around aimlessly all day. When Granny Pinako gave him some chores, he would stop halfway through and gaze blankly at the horizon. He would start trudging down the hill and not come back until the sun had nearly disappeared. He would sit on the front steps and stare at his hands.
Al's gut twisted inside him whenever this happened. It was obvious, wasn't it? Ed was regretting what he'd given up to bring his little brother back. He wanted alchemy again, he wanted a purpose to his life. What was the Full Metal Alchemist without alchemy?
And I took that from him. Al hated himself.
But worse than that, Al was beginning to realize that he hated his brother. What right did Ed have to stain his newfound happiness like this? He'd been dreaming of this for four long years – having a body again, being able to sleep and eat and feel the whole world, relaxing at last with the Rockbells. The only piece missing from this puzzle of happiness was his stupid, selfish brother.
He felt horrible for thinking like that when he knew how much his brother had given up for him, but the more guilty he felt, the angrier he became at the brother who made him feel all of these horrible things. He stewed in this mass of confused feelings for two months after their return home, until finally he couldn't take it anymore.
Al stormed out of the house and stomped off to Ed's favorite tree. Edward was standing under it, gazing vaguely at the stormclouds brewing off to the west. He hadn't even bothered to braid his hair; it waved in a golden tangle, several strands stuck in the edge of Ed's mouth. He didn't even move them, and somehow this made Al the angriest of all. He grabbed the arm he had given up his soul to reclaim and roughly turned his brother to face him.
It took a lot to get Al riled up, but when he did he could yell and carry on as loudly as his brother. "What's wrong with you?" he exploded. "What right do you have to be depressed at a time like this? You're supposed to be happy – we're all supposed to be happy! Why do you always have to ruin everything?"
Ed hadn't moved except to watch his little brother's tirade, and even that didn't seem able to stoke up any kind of emotion in his listless eyes. "Yeah," he said softly, ever so gently prying Al's fingers from his arm. "You're right. I ruin everything. I should just go."
He actually turned to leave, but Al grabbed the front of his shirt and pulled him back around so he would have to look into his brother's eyes. "What's the matter? Everything's going exactly like you always hoped it would! We made it, Brother! We've got our bodies back, we're back home, Winry's here...." He released his brother and took a step back. "Or are you sorry we're here now? Do you wish you hadn't brought me back?"
Finally he got a reaction; Ed recoiled with a look akin to horror. "What? No, of course not!"
"Then why? Why do you act like you wish you didn't exist?"
"Because...." He sighed and looked away. "You've got your body back now. I've fulfilled my promise, and now we're even. You can do whatever you want now. You don't need me anymore."
Al punched him, and Ed was so surprised he fell down. He scrambled to a sitting position, clutching his jaw. "What the heck was that for?!" he demanded.
"I'll always need you, idiot!" Al shouted, kicking at his side so Ed had to roll over to avoid him. "You're my brother! This wasn't a business transaction; you didn't just hold up your end of the bargain and now we're even! I'm going to need my brother for the rest of my life, so stop thinking dumb things like that!"
For a moment, Ed just sat there, looking stunned. Then his face twisted in a scowl and he growled, "Stop calling your older brother an idiot!" He tackled Al's legs and for the next few minutes, their argument was translated into an impromptu wrestling match. Finally Al managed to get the upper hand by twisting Ed's right arm behind him, and as usual, he won.
Al sat triumphantly in front of his brother, crossing his arms and glaring at him. Ed spat grass and hair out of his mouth, then smiled sheepishly. "Well...you win, Al. I was wrong. Sorry."
Just as Al was opening his mouth to reply, Ed suddenly sprang to his feet, rapped Al on top of the head, and yelled, "Last one home's a rotten egg!"
"Hey!" Al scrambled to his feet, but Ed was already sprinting up the hill. He raced after his brother, even though he knew Ed would get there first. Big brothers usually win the race, but only because their little brothers goad them on in the first place.
Then there were the bad days.
They always seemed to come right after the days when he seemed the happiest, like he was coming down from a sugar rush. He would be in high spirits at dinner, joking and eating with gusto, then tickle Al just to hear him laugh and rush off to bed, taking the steps two at a time and appearing to be fast asleep by the time Al entered their room. But the next morning, he wouldn't wake up for hours. He would just sleep and sleep and sleep, and sometimes Al would peek in and catch him just lying there, staring at the ceiling or the wall and not showing the slightest inclination to get up.
When he finally did get up on these days, he would pick at his food, respond to everyone with grunts or monosyllabic words, and wander around aimlessly all day. When Granny Pinako gave him some chores, he would stop halfway through and gaze blankly at the horizon. He would start trudging down the hill and not come back until the sun had nearly disappeared. He would sit on the front steps and stare at his hands.
Al's gut twisted inside him whenever this happened. It was obvious, wasn't it? Ed was regretting what he'd given up to bring his little brother back. He wanted alchemy again, he wanted a purpose to his life. What was the Full Metal Alchemist without alchemy?
And I took that from him. Al hated himself.
But worse than that, Al was beginning to realize that he hated his brother. What right did Ed have to stain his newfound happiness like this? He'd been dreaming of this for four long years – having a body again, being able to sleep and eat and feel the whole world, relaxing at last with the Rockbells. The only piece missing from this puzzle of happiness was his stupid, selfish brother.
He felt horrible for thinking like that when he knew how much his brother had given up for him, but the more guilty he felt, the angrier he became at the brother who made him feel all of these horrible things. He stewed in this mass of confused feelings for two months after their return home, until finally he couldn't take it anymore.
Al stormed out of the house and stomped off to Ed's favorite tree. Edward was standing under it, gazing vaguely at the stormclouds brewing off to the west. He hadn't even bothered to braid his hair; it waved in a golden tangle, several strands stuck in the edge of Ed's mouth. He didn't even move them, and somehow this made Al the angriest of all. He grabbed the arm he had given up his soul to reclaim and roughly turned his brother to face him.
It took a lot to get Al riled up, but when he did he could yell and carry on as loudly as his brother. "What's wrong with you?" he exploded. "What right do you have to be depressed at a time like this? You're supposed to be happy – we're all supposed to be happy! Why do you always have to ruin everything?"
Ed hadn't moved except to watch his little brother's tirade, and even that didn't seem able to stoke up any kind of emotion in his listless eyes. "Yeah," he said softly, ever so gently prying Al's fingers from his arm. "You're right. I ruin everything. I should just go."
He actually turned to leave, but Al grabbed the front of his shirt and pulled him back around so he would have to look into his brother's eyes. "What's the matter? Everything's going exactly like you always hoped it would! We made it, Brother! We've got our bodies back, we're back home, Winry's here...." He released his brother and took a step back. "Or are you sorry we're here now? Do you wish you hadn't brought me back?"
Finally he got a reaction; Ed recoiled with a look akin to horror. "What? No, of course not!"
"Then why? Why do you act like you wish you didn't exist?"
"Because...." He sighed and looked away. "You've got your body back now. I've fulfilled my promise, and now we're even. You can do whatever you want now. You don't need me anymore."
Al punched him, and Ed was so surprised he fell down. He scrambled to a sitting position, clutching his jaw. "What the heck was that for?!" he demanded.
"I'll always need you, idiot!" Al shouted, kicking at his side so Ed had to roll over to avoid him. "You're my brother! This wasn't a business transaction; you didn't just hold up your end of the bargain and now we're even! I'm going to need my brother for the rest of my life, so stop thinking dumb things like that!"
For a moment, Ed just sat there, looking stunned. Then his face twisted in a scowl and he growled, "Stop calling your older brother an idiot!" He tackled Al's legs and for the next few minutes, their argument was translated into an impromptu wrestling match. Finally Al managed to get the upper hand by twisting Ed's right arm behind him, and as usual, he won.
Al sat triumphantly in front of his brother, crossing his arms and glaring at him. Ed spat grass and hair out of his mouth, then smiled sheepishly. "Well...you win, Al. I was wrong. Sorry."
Just as Al was opening his mouth to reply, Ed suddenly sprang to his feet, rapped Al on top of the head, and yelled, "Last one home's a rotten egg!"
"Hey!" Al scrambled to his feet, but Ed was already sprinting up the hill. He raced after his brother, even though he knew Ed would get there first. Big brothers usually win the race, but only because their little brothers goad them on in the first place.
Literature
FMA: One Step Away - Chapter 8
Chapter 8
"So, what do you think of Coventry, Winry?" Ed asked, sliding a knife blade through the packing tape on a box. Winry picked some books up out of another box to place them on the freshly reassembled shelves. She looked up and glanced out the window as she did. "It's a beautiful city," she replied honestly. She hadn't seen a city quite like Coventry before. Earlier when they had first been toting boxes into the townhouse, she had stopped to try to count all the cathedral spires she saw, but she couldn't count past 47 before she lost track of which ones she had already counted.
"It's so much like home, only more
more
" she
Literature
More Than Enough
Edward yawned as he set his empty water glass on the kitchen counter and glanced at the clock: 2:36 AM. He winced.
Why did he even bother staying up so late with his dusty alchemy books anymore? No matter how much he studied or how he longed to feel the exhilarating surge of energy flowing through his fingers again, it wouldn't return that part of him.
Not that he really cared. The sacrifice had been small compared to the overwhelming, almost painful joy of getting his brother back, and he'd gladly give it up for Al again...and more, if he had to. A hundred times over.
The 26-year-old reached up and pulled out his pony-tail, letting long,
Literature
FMA: One Step Away-Chapter 1
"It's been two years since I saw aircraft from another world invading the sky above my own. Two years for Central to pick up the pieces left in the aftermath of the fiasco. What really killed me about all of it wasn't the amount of time having passed since that day, but the people I hadn't seen since then.
"I know Edward was probably on the last piece of burning aircraft I saw, guiding it back through the portal to the world where it belonged. I don't know what happened to Alphonse, however. I'm sure Roy Mustang knows, because he wouldn't speak more than three words to me the next time I saw him. All I can figure is that Al found a way to go
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This is a fanfic of the anime Full Metal Alchemist: Brotherhood, set after the end.
I've had the vague desire to write something about what Ed would act like when he's trying to deal with the aftermath of the Promised Day for a while now, but it took me a while for the vague ideas to come together and make any kind of sense. This isn't exactly my best work, but it's an attempt anyway.
I've had the vague desire to write something about what Ed would act like when he's trying to deal with the aftermath of the Promised Day for a while now, but it took me a while for the vague ideas to come together and make any kind of sense. This isn't exactly my best work, but it's an attempt anyway.
© 2012 - 2024 dark-amethyst
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wow! this was so good!! I think you made my heart stop with all the angst and conflicting emotions in Al. how he felt guilty about being angry at his brother, you never really see Al that angry.
I loved it!!
I loved it!!